Plotting for a Puppy

As a child, I changed my mind a million times about what I wanted to be when I grew up. From a dump truck to a waitress to a professional mommy, I dreamt of it all. As I have grown and matured (and realized that a dump truck is an inanimate object, not a profession), I have been able to hone in on an amazing career in Speech and Language Pathology. I still have dreams of one day being a professional mommy. Don’t we all? Currently Danny is finishing graduate school, I’m just starting my career, and we have a few life goals we would like to meet before we embark on the adventure of having our first child. So of course, as the planner in the family, what went through my mind as the next logical step before having a baby? Puppy parenthood.

Danny and I are both animal lovers, we both had wonderful experiences with dogs in our homes growing up, and I was looking forward to having a precious little puppy of our own. My sweet husband is very frugal and practical, and crushed my euphoric dreams by stating that he didn’t think we needed a puppy yet. Danny is like a sturdy tree with deep roots—calm, collected, and centered, weighing the pros and cons and calculating each decision with sound logic. I am more of the crazy jungle cat type—I love spontaneity, passion usually overrules logic, and I always have a sneaky surprise up my sleeve to help me get what I want. Here begins our story of Operation Puppy.

My first not so sneaky surprise of Operation Puppy? I carried out a “Convince Danny to get Allison a Puppy” campaign via Facebook. I wanted to utilize a public forum such as Facebook to manipulate Danny with blatant propaganda from all of our family and friends to convince him that puppies were the best thing ever. Minor, unforeseen flaw in the plan—people offered practical advice on owning a puppy, along with the financial commitment of pet ownership (yikes!). Facebook campaign fail.

My second sneaky trick was to take him to the Springfield Humane Society. I was convinced that if I could just get him to the Humane Society, he’d take one look at those precious puppy eyes and bring one home with us that day. Have you ever BEEN to the Humane Society? We walked in and overheard a worker telling a lady who brought in a box of sick kittens that they’d all have to euthanized. You have to have a heart of stone to leave that place without an animal or two or twelve. We walked into the back room where all the puppies were. I took one look at the puppies, one look at Danny, and burst into tears. In between my sobs, I told Danny “We…have to….take…them ALL…home!” I felt completely overwhelmed looking at these precious faces who just desired to be loved, knowing that the only play toy they had in their cold, metal cage was their own feces. I held a few puppies I thought were particularly adorable, but Danny refused to hold them. He had his game face on. He was bound and determined that, despite my best efforts, we would NOT be leaving the Humane Society that day with a puppy…and we didn’t. Just call him Stone Cold Slone.

The next tactic was to go on Petfinder.com to look at adorable local puppies and squeal in delight, reeling Danny in to look at the pictures with me and agree that the puppies were precious. I called the local vets and asked for price quotes on the first year of puppyhood, also calling my parents to ask if our puppy could stay with them when we went to visit Kansas City. I even rented a puppy training video from the library and made Danny watch it with me. I realize I’m ridiculous. I had all my ducks in a row, with every piece of information in place. Danny still said no. After my intense, hard-fought campaign, I finally admitted defeat. I told Danny I was okay with not having a dog, and that Team Slone was fine with just Danny and Allison.

Operation Puppy was over…or so I thought. For one whole week, I was a good, respectful wife who listened to the requests of my husband and stopped my campaign for a puppy. Then one day Danny decided to leave me home alone. Bad mistake, Stone Cold Slone. I happened to just glance at Petfinder.com and found the CUTEST dog I had ever seen in my life. She was a precious Pomeranian/Chihuahua mix and I decided right then and there that she would be mine...oops, I mean ours. I e-mailed her picture to Danny, who agreed that she was quite adorable. Operation Puppy was instantly back on in full force, and I wasn’t backing down this time.

I had already tried all of the sneaky tricks I could muster, so I was forced to resort to my last ditch effort—begging and pleading. It reminded me of my childhood, where my sisters and I would tell my parents everything we thought they wanted to hear so we could get a puppy: “I’ll do the dishes for the next year, I’ll walk him and feed him and scoop his poop EVERY day.” Only this time it was “This can be my anniversary present, my birthday present, my Christmas present…” You get the picture. I am a terrific actress, and I gave an Oscar-worthy performance. Long story short, after a long, hard battle, Stone Cold Slone melted into a big pile of Softie Slone.

Meet Miley Foxtrot Slone…cutest puppy ever in existence.



Although Danny tried to give her away to strangers during her first week home with us, we wouldn’t trade her for the world. She brings us so much joy and she has taught us so much about ourselves and each other. We now have a better idea of the kind of parents we will be. Danny will be the overly attentive, calm and steady softie who will take a million pictures of them and the kids will ADORE him. I will be the crazy, spastic, overprotective mom who will be asking “what’s in your mouth?” every five seconds and yet tries to earn their love but they will always love Daddy the most.

By the way, I would like to take this opportunity to state that while I finally got my way and we got a puppy, I think God still punished me for being a disobedient wife. My punishment is that Miley worships the ground that Danny walks on. If Danny’s reading a book, Miley’s curled up sleeping on his feet. If Danny is washing dishes in the kitchen (yes, I realize he’s an angel, not a man), Miley is sitting at his side, watching his every move. When Danny leaves for work, Miley literally cries for a good 20 minutes and stares longingly at the door. Miley loves me too…but only when Daddy’s not home. :)

Stay tuned for more stories on our adventures in marriage and puppy parenthood!

P.S. If any of you blog smarties know how to center my heading, subheading, and picture at the top, can you please help me? I'm not very good at that kind of stuff yet!